Loving Kindness Meditation (Metta)

LKM has its roots in Buddhist practice. It’s sometimes called metta meditation. It can take many forms, but the core elements involve creating an attitude of unconditional kindness toward oneself and others. LKM often involves the repetition of mantras that focus on well-being.

Origin and Meaning

Metta is a Pali word that means kindness, benevolence and goodwill. From the Buddhist traditions, this practise is a contemporary scientific field that demonstrates the efficacy of metta and related meditative practises.

There are so many benefits which include :

Boosting your ability to empathise with others
Development of your positive emotions through compassion which includes being more loving towards oneself
Increased acceptance of self
Greater feelings of competence about your life
Increased feeling of your life purpose

Symbols for Loving Kindness Meditation

Icons such as the heart, feather, shepherd’s staff, endless knot, and lotus flower represent kindness. Deities including Buddha, Guan Yin, and Lord Krishna are known for their kindness and compassion. Animals like the dove, deer, pelican, and raven are gentle, kind animals.

How to do it

As with all meditation, you need to find yourself a comfortable spot. Sit with your eyes closed and within your mind generate feelings in your heart of kindness and benevolence.

Start by developing loving-kindness towards yourself and then progress towards others and all beings.

Being with yourself
Move on to a good friend or good friends
Someone who you feel quite neutral about – perhaps even a stranger
Someone who you feel is a difficult person
All of the above equally
Then gradually include the entire universe

You want to generate a feeling of wishing happiness and wellbeing for everyone. You can enhance this practise by reciting specific words or sentences that evoke the ‘boundless warm-hearted feeling’, visualising the suffering of others being released and sending love. “May we be safe May we be happy May we be healthy May we live in peace, no matter what we are given May our hearts be filled with love and kindness.” Notice the sensations and feelings that arise within you. Also through imagining the state of another being and wishing them happiness and peace.

Ending Off

End off with these words : “May you be peaceful. May you live with ease. End the practice by sending your loving kindness to all beings. Open your heart to the knowledge that, at one time or another, or even right now, all beings have experienced sorrow, loss, egregious injustice, and so on.”

Is this Practise for me?

Are you sometimes too hard on yourself or on others? Or feel like you need to improve your relationships? Loving-kindness meditation will help you. It is beneficial both for selfless and self-centered people, and it will help increase your general level of happiness. You cannot feel loving-kindness and depression (or any other negative feeling) at the same time.

It is also often recommended, by Buddhist teachers, as an antidote to insomnia, nightmares, or anger issues.

I found these wonderful 10 ways to deepen your practise of loving kindness on a website called Kripalu.org :

Think of kindness as a strength, not as a weakness. Kindness isn’t an ally of foolishness or gullibility, but rather an ally of wisdom and courage.
Look for the good in yourself—not as a way to deny your difficulties or problems but as a way to broaden your outlook so it’s more truthful and balanced. Looking for the good in ourselves helps us see the good in others.
Remember that everyone wants to be happy. If we look deeply into any kind of behavior, we will see an urge to feel a part of something greater than our own limited sense of self, a desire to feel at home in this body and mind. This urge toward happiness is often twisted and distorted by ignorance, by not knowing where happiness is actually to be found. Remembering what we share inspires us toward kindness.
Recollect those who have helped or inspired us. Sometimes even a small act of kindness on someone’s part makes an essential difference for us. Cultivating gratitude is a way of honoring these people, and also a way of lifting our spirits and reminding us of the power of good-heartedness.
Practice at least one act of generosity a day. We all have something to give, large or small. It may be a smile, or an attentive conversation. Perhaps you let a stranger get ahead of you in line, or gave a coworker a small gift, or wrote a late-night note of appreciation. Any act of generosity—whether material or of the spirit—is a meaningful expression of kindness.
Do loving-kindness meditation. Each day we can take the time to hold others in our hearts quietly and wish them well. This meditation might include someone who has been helpful or inspiring to us, someone we know who is feeling alone or afraid, someone who is experiencing triumph and joy, or someone we are about to meet with some trepidation. We might, depending on the circumstances of our lives, particularly include children or animals in our thoughts. Taking just 10 minutes a day to reflect in this way is a powerful path to transformation.
Often we have conversations where we are only partially paying attention; we’re thinking about the next e-mail we need to send, or what we forgot to mention to the last person we spoke to. Or we decide we know what the other person is going to say, based on past encounters. Reopening that closed file by listening is a powerful gesture of kindness, one that allows fresh responses and transformed relationships.
Include those who seem left out. In a conversation with a group of people, there may be those too shy to speak. In a room full of partygoers, there may be some who feel out of place. Be the one who opens the circle.
Refrain from speaking ill of others. A friend told me about a time he resolved not to talk about any third person; if he had something to say about someone, he would say it directly to that person instead. If you feel tempted to put someone down, assume knowledge of their bad motives, or generally prove their inferiority, take a breath. Even though we might feel a rush of power in saying those words, we ultimately get no benefit from dividing people and sowing seeds of dissension and dislike. There are ways to talk about wrong behaviour without derision or condemnation.
“Walk a mile in another person’s shoes before you pass judgment.” As this old saying suggests, even if we’re going to take strong action to try to change someone’s behaviour, a sense of empathy and understanding for them won’t weaken us. If anything, that element of kindness will allow us to act more compassionately and creatively.