What To Do When You Don’t Want To Do Anything

How often have you felt this way, that you really just don’t feel like doing anything? The times you should be doing the washing, or following up on that phone call or sorting out those old clothes? I am not talking about the times when you feel ill or haven’t had a good night’s sleep. I am also not talking about when you have a huge project at work or a family member needs your time or you have just received a bad health diagnosis. I am talking about all the times you really just get into a funk and don’t feel like doing anything.

The times when there is no real reason, it’s just that you feel lazy, apathetic, unmotivated, indifferent. Even if you once used to enjoy doing the ‘thing’ you are required to do, it just holds no interest for you, no appeal, no attraction. This vague feeling that you can’t quite put your finger on, feels a lot like procrastination, but somehow isn’t. It is a slightly different experience, because with procrastination we are acting consciously at delaying, avoiding or postponing something that needs doing. We know very well what needs doing, and we find excuses and display behaviour that supports the decision not to do it now.

Whereas with the intangible experience of the ‘not feel like’ doing something there could be something deeper at play.

We need to be brutally honest with ourselves when deciding if it is mere procrastination or a deeper experience happening for our good. We also need to recognise the signs of burn out and depression which present with similar symptoms. It is not surprising that many in the 21^st century are suffering with a combination of these at any one time.

Fatigue, stress, aches and pains, loss of energy, inability to cope with everyday tasks all contribute to us not wanting to do anything more than is absolutely necessary on any given day. We have endless to do lists with limited energy and time.

At a soul level we may experience the much talked about but misunderstood Dark Night of the Soul, where we are robbed of all of the above, plus the loss of any meaning, sense and purpose for our lives. We feel we are literally drowning in the scorching waves of desert sands where our very existence makes no sense anymore.

Before we allow ourselves to be swallowed up by this burning ocean of dread, just know this – we can stop and find our way. We can climb out of the funk and slowly return to life.

Here are some questions that help get me kick started in times like this, and help me to self-assess where I am on the scale. Perhaps they will help you get back on track, or maybe even bring to light the fact that you shouldn’t be on the track in the first place.

Is it just today that I don’t feel like doing anything? Have I felt this way for a few days in a row? Have I felt this way for a few weeks? Once you see how often you feel this way, then you can see if it relates to anything else in your life or it’s just an occasional bad day.

Then look at your energy levels – Are you feeling fatigued or ill or both? How often do you feel this way? Are you getting enough sleep? Are you eating a balanced nutritional diet? Are there any changes in your body that need attention? More aches and pains? More accidents happening… that kind of thing?

Now let’s ask the deeper questions – Are you feeling down, sad or unhappy at the moment? Are you feeling anxious, depressed or overwhelmed? Have you experienced a life trauma in the last few months or within the year? How long or often have you felt this way? Is there a specific situation in your life causing you to feel this way? If trauma related, then you can start to unpack this feeling with a very different lens to just feeling lazy or unmotivated.

Can you see how it is very easy to label someone as lazy or a slacker or loafer. When in fact there could be genuine causes and reasons that are affecting the person in question.

Ps – the slackers and loafers know exactly who they are and would probably not be honest about this to themselves, let alone others. A host of other excuses and reasons would tumble out their mouths, so on this one I am quite sure that if you are searching for answers and reasons, or reading this article then you are certainly not a slacker!

Once you have done a little bit of soul searching you will begin to see if any external factors are playing a part in how you are feeling. By correcting some of your habits and/or realising you are going through a life changing situation you can give yourself a little break, because you know that the feeling will pass, and you will get to the task, the ‘thing’, the duty that needs doing.

Remind yourself that feelings are not facts, you can feel a certain way in the morning and by lunch time there has been a change and shift, however small. So back to what to do if you’ve ruled out illness, trauma or dark night of the soul?

By allowing yourself the space and compassion to simply be in the moment and wait it out is sometimes all you can do. Often these things pass on their own, there are so many external and internal processes and influences shaping our days that it is possible to allow yourself the ‘luxury’ of being lazy for a couple of hours, a day, or a moment. Allowing ourselves to follow the rhythms and cycles of our lives means we have days of productivity, but we have days of rest too. We need to follow nature’s seasonal lead and allow times of busyness and then times of being. Nature doesn’t get it wrong, and neither will we.

So here is my suggested formula – take stock, assess if it is a phase, just a bad day or a chronic condition. Decide what to do from there. If it is just a bad day, then you know that this too shall pass. If it is a phase you are going through triggered by a life altering situation such as a breakup or disease, then find the correct support to help you out of the funk. If it is persistent and a long-term condition – again get the support you need, but acknowledge there are deeper issue that need some inner work.

And if all else fails, just honour where you are, this is where the Universe is much wiser than us. Everything eventually transforms and changes into the next phase of our lives without our having to push so hard. Sometimes no action is the best action of all. And not doing anything will bring you everything that you need.

Nadine Rosin

Global Gypsey Musings

nadine19rosin@gmail.com