If you are a ‘list’ person, and most of us are, please take that list with today’s date on it out right now, and go through it. Let me know if your name is on it anywhere except perhaps for the person responsible for the completion of that list. I really want to know.
How many of us prioritise ourselves – any time of the day – any time of the week – any time of the month – any time of the year?
Yes, we say, I would so love to have my hair cut. I would really love to go for a good massage. I would love to just have a pamper day. I would love to be able to spend a day at home doing absolutely nothing, with no interruptions and no-one calling my name or calling me for anything. That list of I would love to can go on and on – but….. we never allow ourselves these moments as we see it as selfish to be spending money on ourselves, when our children need food, new shoes, clothing, to go to the movies with their friends. When our husbands or wives need a haircut more than we do or need to be spending time with their friends more than we do.
We seriously spend so much time putting ourselves at the back of the priorities list – so much so, that we drop completely off that list.
Here’s why it is important not to do this!
- You leave no room for resentful feelings to creep into your life
- You send a message to others that you too are important
- You don’t feel like you’re working for everyone else
- You see some reward for the work that you do
- You learn to love yourself
- You understand your self-worth
- You acknowledge your place in your own life
- You establish your place in other people’s lives
- You set the scene for all future behaviour
- You are taking care of future you
That’s just ten reasons why, but I’m sure if you give it some thought, you will come up with a few of your own as well.
I want you to remember that you cannot give what you don’t have and I have no doubt that you’ve heard that a million times before. I know that I’ve said it in more than article that I’ve published here on Spirit Connection. However, it is so important that I don’t feel like a broken record just repeating myself yet once again. You truly cannot give what you don’t have.
Knowing that you cannot give what you don’t have, it becomes self-explanatory as to why you should keep yourself on your list of priorities. You need to be filling your own cup in order to be giving from it. And it’s when we try to give from an empty cup that we feel hurt, we feel like we’ve been taken advantage of, we feel like we’re unloved and we become resentful.
What is the root cause of resentment?
There is no one cause of resentment, but most cases involve an underlying sense of being mistreated or wronged by another person. Experiencing frustration and disappointment is a normal part of life. When the feelings become too overwhelming, they can contribute to resentment. Jordan Peterson says this “Do not allow yourself to become resentful. With a sympathetic admission of how difficult life is and how all of us have good and logical reasons for harboring resentment, you have your reasons for being resentful.”
If you examine these reasons, you’ll find that they stem from your own behaviour and not from the behaviours of others. It is important to remember that how you treat yourself, others will follow suit. So when you insist on putting yourself last and others become aware of this behaviour from you, they will automatically assume that that’s okay with you, and they will start to put you at the bottom of their priorities list as well. Then you’re going to find yourself in a circle that just continues to perpetuate your feelings of resentment.
How awesome is it to know that you can change this – you have the power to change how you are treated by others! Perhaps you don’t know this. Perhaps you don’t think it’s possible. Perhaps you just don’t agree with me. But… when you keep yourself on your list of priorities, others will see that behaviour from you too and again, they will follow suit.
So give it some thought today. Are you important enough to keep on your priorities list or are you not important enough? You decide.
Author: Spirit Connection
Spirit Connection is an online platform to facilitate connecting light workers with people seeking their help.
