I know Marc is close by watching over me. He sends signs. The first was when I was able to drive I went to the shops and I always have my radio on in the car. My phone is also connected via Bluetooth so that I can receive and make calls safely if necessary. I finished shopping and got back into my car and switched it on. The radio was dead and there was not even a light on. I switched the car off and back on to no avail. This was weird. Then my phone rang but as I was driving I was not able to take the call. When I got home I again switched the car off and on again. The radio was still dead. I had a feeling it was Marc letting me know he was around. A friend came to visit. He said it was probably a fuse and as I was taking the car for a service a few days later I should mention it to them.
The next day I got into the car, switched it on and the radio worked just fine!!
2 weeks after Marc’s death I had a Facebook friend request from someone saying my name kept coming up which was why she then sent me the request. For 2 weeks she had been seeing sunflowers everywhere and could not understand why. Then she saw one of my posts about sunflowers and understood why she had to contact me. I told her that they were actually Marc’s favourite flower and colour.
I get feathers and I see a lot of sunflower posts on Facebook.
I also have a strong sense of his presence around me at times. He loved music and especially listening to the lyrics, Ed Sheeran – Perfect is one. When we were first getting to know each other he would tell me to listen to various songs, Take That – Rule The Worldwas a special one. They always had meaning relative to our relationship and I know when those songs play that it his him letting me know he is close by.
Rule the World
Take That
You light the skies, up above me
A star, so bright, you blind me, yeah
Don’t close your eyes
Don’t fade away, don’t fade away, oh
Yeah, you and me, we can ride on a star
If you stay with me, girl
We can rule the world
Yeah, you and me, we can light up the sky
If you stay by my side
We can rule the world
If walls break down, I will comfort you
If angels cry, oh I’ll be there for you
You’ve saved my soul
Don’t leave me now, don’t leave me now, oh
Yeah, you and me, we can ride on a star
If you stay with me, girl
We can rule the world
Yeah, you and me, we can light up the sky
If you stay by my side
We can rule the world
Oh, all the stars are coming out
tonight
They’re lighting up the sky tonight
For you, for you
All the stars are coming out tonight
They’re
lighting up the sky tonight
For you,
for you
The other day on my way to my car after work I picked up a feather and it disappeared before I got to my car. When I got into my car a little white moth was sitting on my dashboard, no idea where he came from but it sat there for a while and then that too disappeared. That same evening when I got home I heard a ticking / dripping sound by the window near my computer. I couldn’t work out what it was until my son asked if I had noticed my old clock was working. It had not worked for some years! It even chimed on the half hour and on the hour. A while later it stopped and has not worked again! Another day I was feeling very down and sad, I went to the shopping centre after work and once again when I switched my car engine on my radio would not work. I even turned the engine off and on again but it did not help. When I got back in the car later to come home it came on straight away! His way of saying he was close by.
Marc’s death was 1 month after he had left for Johannesburg. When I told my gynae she looked at me, held my hand and gently said “he could not live without you” and I know this to be true. Our connection was so strong but not everyone understood what we meant to each other.
When we first met he was working out of the country and, as I have already said, we communicated a lot via Skype, email and WhatsApp. We got to know a lot about each other and he always said… friends first, build a good relationship and base and take things from there. We were best friends right up until the end.
Another friend had also picked up on a past life connection with Marc, Ryan and I which was very interesting and certainly made a lot of sense to relationship issues to do with cellular memory. She also told me that Marc ‘gets it all now’ … about time! J I had a very emotional session with her. We had discussed getting together for guidance back on my path once I had recovered from my 1st surgery, I didn’t know at the time there was to be a 2nd or that Marc was going to transition! As things turned out I only got to see her once I was driving myself and before I had to return to work. It was the first time I had not recorded a session and I so wish that I had. He came through so strongly even though that wasn’t the reason for me seeing her. He brought her attention to a piece of jewellery I was wearing that he had bought me. It was a necklace with a heart encircled in a ring which when he gave it to me he said he did not believe in engagement rings and that it was his heart encircled in a ring and a symbol of his love for me forever. The original one was gold but was stolen and I replaced it with a silver one. The song Heart of Gold by Neil Young was given to her before she saw my necklace.
He told her to tell me that at night he still ‘spoons’ / cuddles me. Every night, before my surgery from the time we were together, that is how we fell asleep. After my surgery I was only able to sleep on my back propped up with pillows. She had no way of knowing that this was how we used to fall asleep!
He also told her that he now understood the concerns of my sons with him not working as they had seen what I had gone through with their father and they had also seen how I had managed my life after he had walked out on us. They were very concerned for my future and retirement years. They are also very protective of me. It is only once we have crossed over that we are able to see the full picture with clarity.
A little more background on my spiritual path…
Since doing my Reiki course I have worked with many clients. After a while I started getting images whilst working on their crown chakra & 3rd eye. It took me some time to realise that the images that I received were actually not for me but what I had to pass on to my clients. What I was getting actually made no sense to me even though initially I tried to fathom it out. At the end of a session I tell my clients what I have been given and most times they can relate to this or they have to check it out once they have left in order to validate what they have been told. I also find that by letting them shuffle and pull cards at the end of a session gives them confirmation regarding the messages and they like to have this verification.
In 2013 Healers KZN was formed with 5 committee members – Tracy White, Sharyn McNeil, Linda Liebenberg, Janice Currie and me. I did the secretarial duties and later the marketing, learning as I went along. We held fairs throughout the year and initially I just had a table to promote myself as a Reiki practitioner. I did 3 or 5 card short readings as something interactive and at no cost.
During this time a group of us attended a development circle with Theresa Walstra and she arranged for us to attend a sanctuary on 2 occasions to do readings by which time I only used cards for validation again after I had connected with and given the reading. I then found myself doing readings at our fairs and 1 or 2 other small ones.
Unfortunately we, Healers KZN committee, found that by 2017 the enthusiasm of members, volunteers and regular vendors had dwindled and we were putting in a lot of time and effort with no growth despite our efforts and so we decided to close it down. By this time bigger spiritual fairs were once again taking place.
I moved to a smaller home 3 years ago and found that working full time, helping Marc with his food wagon and being on hand for my elderly parents gave me little time to see clients or have “me time”. I was beginning to feel like a hamster on a treadmill. Our Thursday evening meditation circle is very important and we continue to meet, learn and support each other.
My mission now is to focus on my spiritual path and grow as much as I can, yes I do want to be able to “do it all”, I have wanted that for as long as I can remember and right now I do not feel that I am ‘working’ at my full potential. I am not sure what is in store for me next but for the moment I am taking things slowly and focusing on my own healing, my sons and getting my life in order so I am as ready as I can be for the next part of my journey. I now also know that I was meant to have this time to just be spiritually active with only my meditation group, to enjoy the time I had with Marc and that there are changes coming into my life. Writing this is just the beginning. In the next few months I will be going back to basics and doing a spiritual development workshop to eliminate blockages and step up to be all that I am meant to be in this lifetime. I am also planning a trip overseas in the 2nd half of the year to see some very dear friends and attend their son’s wedding. 2020 is going to be a very exciting year and I plan to embrace every moment.
In all that has happened in my life my spirituality has kept me strong and focused and I am so blessed to be surrounded by all the amazing people who have given, and still give, me so much love and support. They have picked me up when I was broken, held space for me, and helped put me back together. They also watched me come alive again when I found love and happiness with Marc and they shared my heartache when he died.
Never will I forget the good times from years gone by when I was married or the wonderful times I had with Marc and what it took for me to get to where I am today.
I am eternally grateful to all who have played their part in my life story for without each one I would not be the person that I am today.
Your journey has moulded you
For your greater good
And it was exactly what it needed to be.
Don’t think that you’ve lost time.
It took each and every situation you have
Encountered to bring you to the now.
And now is right on time.
~ Asha Tyson ~
Challenges show us how strong we are and teach us lessons we would never otherwise have learned.
I AM blessed.
I AM loved.
I AM love.
I love…
Thank you for allowing me to share my journey, so far, with you.
Namasté
Yours in Love & Light,
Jenny
Jennifer Harris McGarvie
Hands on Healing
Author: Spirit Connection
Spirit Connection is an online platform to facilitate connecting light workers with people seeking their help.
