From Abused To Zen – The Magic Of Guidance – Part One

I walked into the house after a painfully long commute. As always, I was greeted by my dog. After making sure all of the critters were fed and loved, I found myself staring at the empty house.

Ever since my daughter left for college a month ago, the house feels a lack of her energy. My husband works in Seattle during the day, and he’s involved with city politics which consumes much of his nighttime activities.

As I was absorbing the emptiness, out of the blue, I received a piece of guidance. The message told me that I needed to find a place to live next to where I worked.

The old me would have immediately dismissed the message; finding a place for me in Olympia would mean paying rent on top of a mortgage. The new me knows that when you come from a place of lack, you live in lack. Paying for an additional place is living from abundance. When you come from abundance, you welcome more every time, and you will never do without. I loved the idea. I didn’t know what it meant as far as the other parts of my life, but for some reason, that didn’t bother me. When I receive guidance, I know it is for a reason, and I have to follow through.

When my husband finished working for the night, I told him I had to search for a place near the radio station where I worked as an on-air announcer. His typical human reaction was that I was leaving him. No, this isn’t me leaving; this is me not having to spend seven hours a day when I am only at the radio station four hours a day. I loved the idea of having my own space where I could be near work. It also gave me time to meditate and explore consciousness. I was looking forward to substituting my three-hour commute to work with a twenty-minute walk.

It’s very challenging to explain to someone who isn’t on a spiritual journey why we do any of what we do. I knew he wouldn’t be able to wrap his brain around it, but he had to learn to trust me. I have to do what I’ve been directed to do. If we don’t follow the guidance we receive, we push back our growth. They will keep coming back and offering it up in other ways, but it puts a hold on our development. We need to pay attention to the messages we receive; they are the trail of breadcrumbs we need to follow. Although they often don’t make sense at the time, eventually they will. You have to trust.

The search began. Knowing I would no longer be in the house meant complications: I had to find a place where I could bring three cats and a big dog. Most places make you pay a deposit and a monthly fee per animal. This would be a challenge, but I was confident. The message wouldn’t have come if I couldn’t bring them with me. The animals couldn’t handle me not being there for them. I am their person.

Starting in early September, every day, either before or after work, I looked at places to live. My dog has hip dysplasia, so I needed a place without stairs if possible, but I wouldn’t be picky.

I looked at apartments and houses for rent; I even started entertaining the idea of buying a home. If we bought a place, it would be an investment, and there would be no charge for having my pets with me. I was spinning in so many different directions, I wasn’t sure what would be the best option, but I was on a mission!

Finally, after exhausting myself by looking at house after house, I found one near the station that I was ready to settle for; we all know what that means.

It was a small house with a fenced-in yard – perfect for my pets. One negative feature was a very steep staircase leading down to the basement. It was part of the living space; definitely not good for my dog.

I decided I would pull the trigger and go for it. It was early December, and I was tired of looking. They were giving me a break on the animals, so the place was affordable. Then they told me they wanted me to take possession the following week. My daughter would be coming home for her college’s three-week Christmas break that weekend, so I told them it would have to be after the first of the year. They said I had to do it now. I then offered to pay rent for an entire year in advance if they could wait three weeks. By this time, I felt like I was swimming upstream. They refused the offer.

That was it. This was clearly not meant to be. We parted ways, and I put any thoughts of moving aside. I wanted to enjoy my daughter.

The day after her dad took her back to school, I was back at work when I received a text message from a number I didn’t recognize. It said, “Are you still looking for a place in Olympia?” I responded, “As a matter of fact, I am.”

I met him after work and just driving down the street, I knew it was where I was supposed to be. Everything aligned perfectly. Then, I had to laugh.

I couldn’t believe I didn’t even think about what I was doing. I was working so hard at trying to make something happen that I kept pushing it away. When I finally let it go, it immediately came to me the day after my daughter went back to school.

The more we try to make things happen, the more we push them away. Let go. Allow. Our “belief” is that we have to work hard. We don’t; life truly can be easy.

Cari Palmer Bio:

If I hadn’t lived the many phases of my life, I wouldn’t believe it could all happen in one lifetime. All I imagined after giving up my victim card was being a writer/speaker for Hay House. I was the queen of self-help and I was ready to change lives. Fast forward a decade or two and now, after re-membering who we are and why we are here, self-help was a lifetime ago.

Following my guidance has brought me to a place I couldn’t ever imagine! I have mastered living in the present moment. I have become a Zen-like creature. Once you feel this good in every moment, you can never go back. When you realize we create our own reality, why would we make any part of this thing we call life miserable?

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