Addiction in the Mirror

In a world of judgement and criticism, disconnection and ‘me, myself and I’ thinking, is there a way to turn around that individual perspective that allows for reconnection and empathy?

I say yes.

The proverbial How To always looks and sounds easier than it is, but simplicity truly is the drive of our soul, both in guidance and in offering solutions. I embrace the simpleness of the How To answer to the above question.

We’ve all been taught to be selfish is not cool and is probably a sure-fire way of ensuring people aren’t seeking out solutions for the greater good or highest objective of more than one person. “Selfishness is being concerned excessively or exclusively, for oneself or one’s own advantage, pleasure, or welfare, regardless of others.¹” Oftentimes being selfish is taught to us from a young age in a manner that punishes us for thinking of ourselves and instead to think only of others, sometimes to our detriment, ignoring healthy boundaries. The line between selfish and self-fullness is understandably very fine and depending on the intentions of the person(s) involved, also open to interpretation. At the same time, how many of us have been taught healthy attitudes or tools that are self-fullness? Do you know what it means to take care of yourself and still care for others? Is empathy teachable? Is there enough drive within ourselves to include self-love in that action of empathy and caretaking?

I believe that it simply is crucial to learn about self and know about self on all levels. Yes, outwardly the life journey of getting to “Know Thyself” may appear to some as self-absorption and selfishness but its partner is knowing thyself through the journey of authenticity and expression of that self. There’s also the meeting of one’s own needs through self-responsibility and healthy independence.

But all of this is done, in my belief, with the soul intent to serve All. It is in service to All That Is (of which we are all One and connected) that one yields the greatest opportunity to utilise our power and light to individually add to the collective of raising each other up. It is through my self-fullness that I’m best equipped to shine my own light AND participate in the collective consciousness that affects all living kingdoms.

How do I work at self-fullness?

I connect inwards and look outwards. I engage with the mirrors that are reflections of both my micro and macrocosms. I courageously look at relationships with curiosity whilst inviting in a natural communication of transmission and reception that is always taking place with everything within and with-out me. I open myself to the network of connectivity that is ground support as well as Universal be-ing. And I see me. And when I see me, I know how best to serve the greater good. When I hear and feel that which I’m processing, transmuting, transforming, understanding, integrating, learning etc – I know what it is that I’m contributing to the greater whole. I sense my purpose and investment into the evolution and progression of life on Earth.

What did I find recently?

I looked and saw what was in my space and asked myself what is this communicating to me about me? Once I unveiled that answer, I knew I’m currently working on my soul growth but also my service-to-other commitments and contribution. I saw addiction. I saw disconnect. I saw escapism. I saw lack of self-responsibility and accountability. I saw self-harm. I saw in my closest reflection all of these and more. And I fluctuated between compassion and ‘tough love’, wanting to be accepting of this person’s addictions but also actioning a new story for myself that meets my needs for security and needs met. I looked and saw my own addiction: being addicted to keeping others happy, being ‘good’, being acceptable so that I won’t be rejected. All of this saw me recognising that I lose myself and my needs in favour of me thinking I’m keeping others happy.

How to turn self-absorption into connection and service to All?

Become self-full with the curiosity of a cat; the innocence (inner sense) of a child; with the response-ability of an adult and the growth ability of a soul. Like a dog, be loyal to yourself and your life expressed through you. Like a tree, stand strong, firm and connected to your Heavenly world as well as your Earth Mother. Like the beautiful, sparkly bling of a well-designed dress, shine your light whilst wearing yourself proudly for all to see and benefit from. Like lovers high on intimacy, truly love and enjoy your life.

If we work with this simple drive to embrace ourselves, self-fully, if we celebrated the Self as opposed to making ourselves feel bad about ourselves, then we are all serving each other for the greater good of the Whole. And because we’re doing this by really looking and seeing each other, the mirror reflections, and seeing into ourselves, then we exponentially grow the empathy and compassion vibration here on Earth.

Much love always

Colette

Colette, mother to 2 beautiful daughters and author of “Spirit in Pregnancy & Birth – Practical and spiritual care, ceremonies and celebrations” has always had her heart set on helping others through her ability to listen, feel and then support through guidance and a change in perspective, offering emotional support that lets people feel safe and heard.

Loving to share her experiences, knowledge and perceptions of the world around us, Colette has many interests that fuel her sharing and nurturing nature: Alternative modalities, nutrition, women’s health, conscious birth and parenting, astrology, Mother Earth, transformation, healing, channeling, spirituality, Mother Nature and much more.

colettevanheerden@yahoo.co.uk +27 82 354 8873

¹https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selfishness