Success – We’ve Got It All Wrong!

I had such an interesting conversation with my spirit guides last night. Yes, I do speak to them every day and very often, I get some really good insight into myself and people in general.

I started the conversation, because it felt to me that success is a word that is being used a lot right now. And for the most part, it has a very negative connotation. The reason I say this is that most of us don’t see ourselves as being successful. And in speaking to my guides, I got to realise that people in general, measure success with money. If you earn a big salary, drive fancy cars, dress in designer clothes and have loads of available cash in the bank, then you are successful.

I work with a lot of lightworkers and as you can imagine, this work does not make you a millionaire. Sure there are people like Tony Robins who rake in the bucks, but for those of us, who do readings, coaching and energy work, there is not huge money to be made. And very often, because there are times when expenses outweigh income, there is that sense that we’re just not successful in our chosen career. Now, this doesn’t only go for lightworkers. I think it applies, in general, across the board. Many people who come to me for coaching or readings, do not see themselves as successful. And the reason is always the same. They don’t have money. And of course the interpretation of ‘I don’t have money’ varies again, across everyone. For some, I don’t have money means literally that, for others, it means I don’t have what I perceive to be enough money to make me feel comfortable or to afford those extra things in my life that I believe I deserve. Something along those lines.

I would like you to take a few moments to do a quick analysis of your life. Write down what success feels like to you and how you would describe success for yourself. You may want to list, owning your own home, driving a better car, earning a bigger salary. And all these things are perfectly okay, because we do need to be striving to make our lives better and again, everyone has a different version of what a better life looks like for themselves.

I have to share here that I don’t see myself as being particularly successful, especially in terms of what is socially perceived to be successful. However, what my guides were explaining to me, is that every day, when I achieve one small thing, I am being successful. So every day that I get a booking for a consultation or reading, that is me being successful. Every day that I cook a great meal, I am being successful – I am contributing successfully to my physical health. Every day that I watch a movie that really moves me emotionally, I am being successful – I am contributing to my mental health. Every day that I laugh at myself or something someone said, every day that I spend great quality time with family and friends, I am being successful. I am successful in that I am contributing to my overall wellbeing and if I don’t do anything about my wellbeing, then having all the money in the world won’t make any difference to my life.

Once you’ve finished writing about what success looks like to you, then take a look at your life, and see all the small things that you achieve on a daily basis and see if you can translate them into small successes that you’re achieving every day, which are contributing to your overall success.

The Oxford Dictionary describes success as : the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. “there is a thin line between success and failure” Whilst I agree with the accomplishment of an aim or purpose, I don’t really agree with there being a thin line between success and failure. The reason I say this is that just because you did not achieve something that you set out to do, that does not mean that you are a failure. And this is why I say that we have success all wrong!

There are always two outcomes for anything that we set out to do in our lives, or there are always two choices for anything that we set out to do in our lives. Either we achieve what we set out to do or we didn’t. That doesn’t make us any less human whichever way that particular incident went. It also doesn’t make us any less successful. What it does mean, is that we have created opportunities for us to learn from the mistakes that we made and we get to give ourselves another opportunity to get it right. From the perspective of having achieved what we wanted to, that also affords us the opportunity of a lesson. The lesson there being that you have the capacity to do anything that you want to and you have the strength to achieve what you want to, when you set your mind to it.

All the time you’re learning about yourself. You’re walking along your spiritual and physical journey and you’re negotiating every aspect of it. In those negotiations, we get to make choices – that’s why we have free will. Again, if a choice that you made, does not bring to you to the outcome that you had in mind, that does not make you a failure. And if you did achieve the outcome, every little step that you took along the way, was one more successful step in the direction of achieving your desired outcome.

I am particularly concerned with self-help programs in the way that they are designed, because they create the impression that there must be something wrong with you, because you haven’t achieved success in your life. You know those get rich quickly schemes, those 10 things successful people do every day, follow these easy 25 steps and you’ll become successful – the list goes on.

What I want you to do today, and every day from now until you breathe your last breath, is see yourself as this amazing human being who can achieve anything that you want to. And just because you don’t meet someone else’s criteria for success, doesn’t make you a failure – it just makes you different.

Of course, you know that I am always here to help you, whether it’s through a reading, or a few spiritual life coaching sessions – please do reach out if you think I can make a difference in your life. [email protected] or +27 (0)82 570 6473

Until next time