I wish to share my story about how important creative expression is for emotional healing and how to work on creative blocks.
When my husband of twenty years broke it to me that he didn’t love me anymore, I was heartbroken, devastated. I didn’t know what to do with myself. But one thing I did do, as a total survival mechanism, was to take out a pencil, paper, and some pencil crayons and started drawing. I also wrote a fantasy novel, my first in that genre. The creative expression gave me healing. It enabled me to enter a meditative state away from my troubled thoughts about my future.
The past two and a half years I have struggled with writer’s block. For someone who’s passionate about writing, it has been painful, to say the least. I’ve started several books and then tossed them aside. I’ve stared at the screen so many times, trying to come up with a book idea, but nothing has stuck. I managed to write two books which, thankfully, have found their homes at small e-book publishers. For me, that was definitely not enough to keep me occupied and in ‘the zone’. It’s not about getting a contract, or about the money (which has never been great), but rather about doing something I love doing, which hasn’t been flowing.
I needed to find a way out. With spring arriving, and new life appearing all around me, I knew it was time for that life to spring forth from my creative self.
A couple of months back, I arranged for a Reiki session with a lady I met at a meditation circle. It was incredible. When she worked on my sacral chakra (the second chakra based below our naval, in the abdomen), I felt an almost pain. I knew there was a huge block there. I felt the same in my throat chakra. She confirmed that she’d felt both those chakras needed work, but especially my sacral chakra as I’m numerically a number 2 (according to my birth date), so it’s the chakra I need to work on in this lifetime. She advised me to wear orange and work on that chakra, which I have been doing. It’s been kind of fun. And I’ve noticed a healing taking place.
If we’re having a blockage in our creative expression, it could be caused by a blockage in our sacral chakra. There may be roots of pain embedded in there from things that have happened to us. I knew that I’d suffered emotional trauma and even a form of sexual trauma as my ex told me that I wasn’t good enough for him, in that way. Through the work on my sacral chakra and reading material in that area, to open my eyes to the truth, I’ve found healing.
I’ve finally reached the point, after more than two years, where I’m thankful for what happened to me because it has caused me great growth.
The sacral chakra also enables our sexual expression. There is power in our sexual energy. We need to embrace that part of ourselves. Single people often think they should be ignoring that side of themselves, but that is not a good thing. We need to accept and embrace our sexuality, in whatever form it takes—whether our sexual orientation, or whether we’ve been told it’s wrong to pleasure ourselves. When we honour our own sexual side, we open up our sacral chakra. When we accept that we are perfect just the way we are—even if someone has criticized our style, or “drive”—we become strong and powerful beings. Emily Nagoski’s book, “Come as You are” has really helped me heal this side of my psyche. When we accept and embrace our sexual selves, we open ourselves up to our creative flow.
Since I’ve been working on my sacral chakra, I won’t say that my writer’s block for writing novels has disappeared. But I’m learning to find a freedom in expressing myself through words, as that is my calling. My Reiki friend said that my throat chakra was blocked because I wasn’t expressing my truth enough. So, I’ve been putting my truth onto the page.
I’ve worked on finding other ways to express myself through my time of blockage. I’ve tried water painting, sculptures, candlemaking, tie-dyeing, collage, and now I’m doing Inktober https://inktober.com/rules/. At the end of a long day, drawing a simple ink sketch has been cathartic. Some people love to draw mandalas or colour in adult colouring books.
One of the biggest things that can get in the way of creative expression is feeling like we need to produce something great all the time, or even at all. As soon as we put that pressure on ourselves, we restrict our creativity. As soon as I felt I had to create more books to be published, because that’s what people expected of me, I felt blocked. The answer is to tap into that intuitive part of our beings and just let it flow. That’s very hard for me, as an editor, who is used to correcting things. In the end, it’s about giving into the part of ourselves that enjoys making something beautiful or something out of nothing. It’s getting into the rhythm of The Universe—creativity and new life. Every spring, we are reminded of this new life, which yes, may have to go into a death / quiet time every winter, but know that those new shoots will come, with a lot more new life. But we have to be willing to be quiet and nurture ourselves through the cold winter times when our flow isn’t as seamless. It’s during those “winter” moments that something is brewing inside us. The seed gets buried in the ground. The plant may look dead. But come spring, and new life springs forth to surprise and enchant your soul.
Yes, we may actually produce that masterpiece, but it may not happen straight away. It’s a matter of getting into the flow and letting it happen organically. Even if we don’t produce a masterpiece, it’s the pleasure that has come from the task, and the healing and meditation of going into ‘the zone’. It’s the fun of working toward a goal. It’s the enjoyment of playing with a hobby we love. There is joy in creating something that another will enjoy. Let’s work on healing our emotional and sexual beings so we can get fully into the flow and produce amazing things. Here’s to the no. 3 energy.
Kathy is a sassy single, homeschooling mom, who gets paid to read and edit amazing stories during the day. She loves writing, reading, crafts, dancing, delving in the world of spirituality and magic, and spending time with family and friends. She used to write mostly romantic fiction, but lately, after some spiritual epiphanies, has been delving in the world of self-help non-fiction writing. You can find her musings at www.kathybosman.com