You Are Who You Have Been Looking For

I came across this speech by Adam Roa the other day and just had to share it with you. When you watch it, don’t be surprised to find yourself needing a tissue. The message will hit you right in your very core! And why is it so emotional? Because we all fall prey to manipulation of our self-worth!

We are constantly in that cycle of assigning the weight of our self-worth based on the opinion of others outside of our self. Instead of seeing the wonderful and beautiful soul that we are, we are always too fat, too thin, not tall enough, too tall. Our hair is too curly, too straight, too dark, too light. I can remember my mother always saying to me that I must watch my behaviour, because what will other people think. I shouldn’t show any emotions or be too loud, or enjoy myself just too much. I should keep my free spirit at bay at all costs to myself – because what will other people think?!

And it’s really sad to me today, to see how people are fooled into a false sense of security based on the number of likes their posts get, how many people follow them on Instagram and whether or not their tic toc video is trending… People listen to me…

YOU ARE ENOUGH AND YOU ARE WHO YOU HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR!

Think about those moments when you are alone in your home, dancing to your most loved music. You do it because no-one can see you. But, how does it make you feel? You feel connected, at peace and for just that moment in time, you feel yourself, your absolute true self with no strings attached, no fear of ridicule because your voice is off-key when you sing along and your dance movements look like you’re a puppet on a string! Now think about yourself doing exactly that in a room full of strangers – would you do it? I’m guessing not and why? Because you don’t believe that you are enough.

If ever there was a time for you to begin to fall in love with yourself, it is now! Isolation has been tough for us all. Social distancing has been challenging to say the least. Hiding our faces from the world behind masks has had it’s own challenges as well. This pandemic has, for some of us, forced us to hide our light from the world, and for those who already don’t like being part of the world, it has made them even more recluse.

I tell you this with love and a deep understanding for the human psyche. WE NEED REAL PEOPLE IN OUR LIVES! It is the way we navigate through our chosen lessons and it is the only way that we can allow ourselves to grow emotionally and expand our awareness of others and the world around us. But… in order to reap the benefits of the many relationships that we have with others, we need to first find ourselves. We need to seek from ourselves, that permission and approval that we so badly seek in perfect strangers. Our approval of ourselves needs to be the most important thing that we strive for. Giving ourselves permission to be that free soul that our mothers tried to stifle. Giving ourselves permission to live in a body that may be flabby, may be too tall, may be too thin. Giving ourselves permission to just be no matter what the opinion of others is.

And of course I’m not saying just go mad and misbehave and run around in your underwear doing your shopping because you feel that’s your way of expressing yourself. Naturally there are socially acceptable behaviours and this is not what I’m referring to when I say love yourself and give yourself permission to be yourself. It’s about not feeling conscious about your smile because you don’t like your teeth or not going out without make-up on your face, because it will appear to others that you don’t take care of yourself. It’s about eating that slice of cake when you feel like it rather than deny yourself, because others may think you’re being a glutton or it may add an extra few ounces to your weight and already you’re being judged by others because you’re ‘fat’.

Please watch the video right to the end – I know you will love it. And – please let this year, be the year that you love yourself, totally unconditionally and the year that you give yourself total permission to be yourself.