Talking to Myself | Spirit Connection

Now that social distancing has become a thing and people are staying home more often, have you noticed that you speak to yourself more now than you used to? I know from my own experience, my internal conversations used to take place whilst driving to work and back or driving to the shops and not so much at home. Usually just in a space where I was alone and could be with my thoughts. But now, I have my groceries delivered to the door so don’t get to the shops too much, and…. I spend a lot of time at home on my own. My internal dialogue has definitely been dialed up a notch or two!

Internal dialogue is great – it’s necessary, but it can also be destructive. I have found recently that I am doing readings more and more for young people who are struggling to find themselves, struggling to see where they fit in, in a world where it’s become unacceptable for people to mix, to meet and have fun together. Maybe unacceptable is a harsh word, but it has definitely become frowned upon to want to be with other people – now you get seen as being irresponsible for wanting to socialize. And from younger people’s perspective, it’s important for them to interact with their peers. It is how they find their way in this world. It is how they get to understand where and how they fit in and it is what gives them a sense of belonging and a sense of purpose.

Young people and children especially, have a way of blaming themselves for everything. If they aren’t liked by anyone, and it may just be their perception, then it is their fault. It must be something that they have done to make this other person feel about them they way they do. They don’t have the ability to reason through any thought processes and understand that they probably had nothing to do with the other person’s perception of them at all. And so the internal dialogue that takes place, becomes destructive in that they continue to affirm for themselves, that they are not likeable and they aren’t people who can be accepted socially. It definitely becomes a downward spiral into darkness, depression and can result in self-harming behaviour.

We need to all be very aware of the internal conversations that we have with ourselves and where we have young children, we need to try to get into their heads as well to be able to understand how they see themselves and what they think. It’s not an easy process but just keeping the lines of communication open between you and your child or young teenager, is a start. Making them feel their self-worth through your behaviour will ensure that the conversations that they have with themselves is not negative and destructive.

We have to know that through our internal conversations, we create the world that we live in. It is how we perceive the world to be and our behaviours, choices and actions are based on those internal conversations. So today, just a word of caution to become consciously aware of how you think and talk to yourself, because chances are, your children are doing the same thing and thinking the same and seeing the world the same as you do. You are who they look to for guidance and inspiration and your opinion of them matters so much in their lives.