Uranus just recently moved back into Aries, which in my chart is in my 4th house of home. Why this is so significant is because I am a Self Love Coach and Mentor and my childhood wound has largely been around not feeling wanted – or more specifically I am not lovable, that’s why no one wants me. A deep trauma that I know many feel. I thought that I had dealt with all of this stuff? Fast forward 42 years and I am in the same outer circumstances reflecting my inner wounded-ness, as I experienced as a little girl. Let me briefly set the scene: I am living in a lovely house which is not my own. I lost it all when I left an abusive relationship. I do not have a steady income as I walked away from an amazing corporate career. I now find myself reliant on the adults in my life to help me, which is also new for me as I am so independent. So based on all the aforementioned it makes so much sense to feel like that 5 year old little girl again, unsafe and unwanted.
My role as a coach is to work through limiting beliefs that keep us in fear and playing out old default behaviour patterns. I am sharing this hoping I can offer some relief to anyone reading this. We live in such a benevolent Universe of unconditional love that our minds cannot comprehend such love. It is beyond our limited human experience and understanding. I share this because I am someone who chooses to have a higher perspective of what is happening to me in my life that at first glance appears as suffering. I could get stuck in all those very emotionally painful conditions I mentioned, but this is not how I choose to view it.
My intention is to live with conscious loving awareness that everything in my life is always working out for me because I am a part of something far greater and more beautiful than my mind can see but my heart knows. There is that part of me that is pure grace and sacredness. This is the part of me, my wise self that is connected to all life, the One Big Spirit and it is this inner grace that guides me. I refer to the astrology as it is a powerful energy tool I have begun to use to begin to understand my self and life more intimately.
Back to the beginning, here I am with all this pain coming up and feeling it so deeply because of my circumstances, that I have been moody and paralysed in it for the last 2 weeks. It has hurt so bad I could not even apply what I know to be true, the pain felt more real than my faith in Source and my intuitive wisdom. So I finally sat down when I had reached the limits of my painful thinking and quietened my mind, which ironically is what was fueling my pain.
I started to self sooth, bringing me back to the awareness that there is no out there out there, all life is lived from peace in the inner world. Right now my outer circumstances are showing me my deep deep pain that I need to release, and a deep call for my own self love and acceptance. I cannot heal my pain by changing my circumstances, I can only heal and release my beliefs that are causing me pain, which then miraculous allow my circumstances to change or not. Either way, I am back to peace, back to being in the fullness of love and then able to see life very differently and allow my self to receive Divinely inspired action and guidance from peace and not pain, to show me the way forward. The truth is, life is always trying to show you the way to a more loving peaceful existence that is our God given birth right. Our responsibility is to become aware of this truth and take responsibility for both our pain and our peace. The deeper truth is we are the power of the universe and to then allow this life force to move you in ways that truly are a miracle. Believing anything less renders us powerless and at the mercy of our outside circumstances.
Wherever you are and whatever the circumstance, this is a call to you from your higher self to look at life through the loving eyes of grace and know your peace lies in your pain.
Shift your perception and begin to become aware of what the pain is trying to tell you and show you, that everything is Love. We need to just learn to see ourselves and the world that way. As a Course in Miracles says, “A miracle is a shift in perception.” Allow yourself to receive one because dear soul you deserve it but only you can allow yourself to receive it.
“My back ground is Finance Marketing and Sales, yet the skills that contributed to my huge success in the corporate world were those that I have realized I have been innately gifted with – that is my insight and ability to genuinely connect with others from the heart. I have a deep desire to bring out the joy and beauty in others for the Greater good of all – even while being in the corporate arena it was always a part of my DNA. Looking back I see this was my “super power” and not just my ambition and hard work. I left it all 9 years ago and took the proverbial road less travelled for me, I gratefully lost my self (the social self I had created for others to see) and in getting lost I found my Essential Self, the sacred place within of true strength, wisdom and creative power. As my relationship with my Self became more honest, real and connected, I felt my connection with others more deeply and authentically. The road less travelled turned out to be the divinely created one for me as a Life Coach of Self Love which is all about remembering the one Truth of who we are, and that is Love. The road continues to unfold in Love, as do I.