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The Gift of Forgiveness

Is forgiving people something that comes easily to you?  Are you able to let bygones be bygones?  Or… do you hang on to the negative emotions that come when someone does something that in order to move past, requires that you forgive them?

Interestingly I’ve heard it said many times, that to forgive is something that you need to do for yourself, not for the other person involved.  And I would completely agree with this.  Because hanging on to negative emotions is so unhealthy for us on many levels.  It keeps us locked into a particular timeframe that we cannot move past, it keeps us focused on things that don’t serve us well and it keeps us, more than anything, from sustaining a sense of inner peace and calm.

Focusing on the negative creates turmoil in our lives is so many different ways.  This happens because whatever it is that is happening in our lives at any particular times, whatever power we feed into it, is going to grow and become more prominent and stronger.  Understanding that the universe is filled with the creative energy that is the Great I Am, the creator of everything that there is, brings home the truth that says, whatever you send out into the universe is exactly what will be reflected or sent back to you.

Become aware of what you  give your power to or what your focus your energy on.  Remember at all times that if it doesn’t serve you well and doesn’t serve the people around you well, then your energy is just wasted.  However, there are times, when we find ourselves getting caught up in issues or situations that aren’t beneficial to us. People say things that hurt.  People do things that offend.  People can be downright nasty and ugly sometimes.  But, hear this : it is not what happens to you that matters, it’s how your interpret what happens and how you choose to react.

So yes, there could be times when you find yourself, angry, frustrated, annoyed, perplexed, judging, resentful, hateful, spiteful, revengeful and all the other negative emotions that I’ve not listed here.  And yes, there could be times when your reaction to those emotions, situations, or issues, could be hurtful, could have devastating effects or outcomes for others and yes, we do these things because we’re human, and we’re learning and practicing relationships all throughout our entire lifetime.

But, when you find yourself in these situations, what is it that you do.  Do you let it go or do you hold onto it.  Forgiving someone for something that they did to you, is a gift that you give to yourself and I urge you to see it that way.  I urge you to find it in  your heart, to always try to see the other person’s perspective, even if it means that you have to admit that you were wrong.  Because being right is not the answer.  True communication requires of us that are at all times honest.  And not self-righteously honest, if you know what I mean.  So not telling someone what you think even if it will cause  them pain, just because someone needs to be honest and you’re taking it for the team.  That’s not being honest, that’s being sanctimonious and giving yourself a sense of superiority.

To truly be able to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes and to understand that none of us is perfect, allows you to forgive completely.  It doesn’t mean that you have to forget and again, I’m not saying hold on to the revengeful kind of feeling of oh I’ll never forget and I’ll never let you forget.  I’m saying never forget so that you don’t find yourself reacting the way that you did in the first place.  Never forgetting the way that an unproductive, negative encounter made you feel as well as the other person involved and ensuring that you walk your path, trying to make yourself a better person, which means that you won’t repeat the same mistakes.

Forgiving someone for the wrongs that they have done, means that you give yourself permission to move on in your life.  It gives you the power to understand that what happened was wrong and that you don’t want to repeat that journey.  And that’s a great gift to give yourself. Because it is facilitating your spiritual growth.  It is allowing you to become more human as you walk through life and by becoming more human, I mean much more in touch with your true essence.  And when that connection to your true essence is made, you will become completely whole and you will encounter the mind, body and soul connection that your higher self craves.  And you will see life differently and you will wonder why you never thought about forgiving as being a gift to yourself and why you didn’t do it earlier.

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