If you were given the opportunity to be taken back to the start of your life, from a point where you can remember, would you do it all again? I think this is quite an interesting question. And if you were to answer it really honestly, you would need to think about everything has happened in your life from that point onward.
I’m willing to bet that we all have done things that we regret. We have all done things that in hindsight we would not have done or not have handled in the manner in which we did. But on the other side of the coin, I’m sure we’ve all done things that we’re really proud of and have handled situations that we’re really happy about the outcome because of the manner in which we handled it.
It goes without saying that when all is said and done, we take the good with the bad and vice versa. So with that in mind, would a do-over make your life better? Who knows that we’re guaranteed, that armed with the knowledge that we have of our present lives and everything that has led up to this present moment, we would make a better job of our lives? Who’s to say that we wouldn’t mess things up? Who’s to say that we wouldn’t be tempted to make decisions that perhaps at the time, we were cautious about, and now feeling more confident, could take us down a whole different path that leads to a very different outcome? And would you welcome that? I’m not so sure that I would!
Is it actually possible to change the past? Things that have happened and relationships that have come and gone, have all been there for us for the betterment of ourselves, whether we acknowledge that or not – whether we see it or not. I suppose it’s all about that flipping between victim and victor mode. And we do it all the time, sometimes when it suits us and allows us to explain certain things away. This makes me believe even more that we need to be taking absolute full responsibility for our lives, particularly in terms of how we conduct ourselves every day. Who we love. Who we interact with and how we do that. What we allow others to see in us. What we’re prepared to give away. What we’re prepared to settle for if we prepared at all to settle. Whether or not we strive for excellence all the time. Excellence in everything that we do. That doesn’t mean being the winner, it just means doing the best with what we have at the time.
My guide told me once that a good exercise for anyone is to pick a number – that number that you think could be your day to leave this earthly existence. So say I chose 90 years of age. Then, to write your life story up to the point where you currently are. And then to follow on with your story, but to write it from age 90 back to your current age. It’s a very interesting way to work out how you want you life to turn out. Focusing on how you want to be remembered, so what will your legacy be, then working back to fill in those blanks, helps you to come up with a plan to either continue on the trajectory that you already are on, or to move the sites a little to ensure that you get to where you want to be. It also gives you more time to work on achieving that outcome.
A truly great way to keep track of where you are in your life, is to start a journal. It doesn’t have to be anything great, it doesn’t have to be one that is focused on anything in particular, except to record some of the impactful things that happen in your life. Record the times where you were angry or hurt and how that came about. Record the times where you were happy and joyful and how that came about. Record your feelings about a particular incident, what that incident was and how you handled it or if it came about because of something that someone else did, why, in your opinion did that happen. Was it you? Was it because of something that you said or a way in which you reacted, that with hindsight could have been said differently or done differently. I think we tend to go through our lives so much on auto-pilot that we don’t always see our faults and we seldom see our achievements. We very seldom give ourselves credit for the good things that we do and the nice things that we say and the nice things that we do for ourselves and for others. It’s really not difficult. It actually just takes a couple of minutes every few days. Doesn’t have to be every day.
You may want to start a separate section from the back of the book, where you record every compliment that you get and every compliment that you give. Writing things down, allows us to see how often or how seldom things happen, or we say or do things. It allows us to become more aware of our lives on a conscious level every day. It allows us to be in the moment because it kind of forces us to look back at the day and to pick out the good and the bad and to see how they weigh up against each other. Then, from there, take action to rectify.
Why don’t you try it and let me know how it goes. I love to get your feedback so remember I can be contacted on firstname.lastname@example.org